Super Elrod

earth is blowing up, and you are sent to another planet where the inhabitants are called 'elrods'. elrods can be shot and killed with marshmallows. their top speed is a brisk walk. they can't jump over a phone book, and falling into even the shallowest of ditches is catastrophic. but you are still you. you block marshmallows with ease, jump over ditches and phone books effortlessly, and run faster than their fastest vehicle...which is a golf cart. would you allow them to call you 'superelrod'? i doubt it. i doubt you'd want to ever help them. you'd have such a poor opinion of them after constantly saving them from the likes of marshmallows and shallow ditches. "really?! you fell in a ditch again?! this is pathetic." i doubt you'd show up in tights and carry on like a big deal. "it's superelrod! able to leap phone books, block a speeding marshmallow, and run faster than a golf cart!" would you show off? "look how marshmallows bounce off of me!" can't blame you for doing that. probably feels better than getting cut from the basketball team back on earth. now, go get some tights.